To me, these are just cop-outs to say mean things to people and make sure you feel ok in saying them. "I'm sorry, but that outfit is ugly," or "I'm sorry, but you're just fat and need to lose weight." etc. etc.
No. You're not sorry. Putting those 3 words in front of your statement does not excuse you from your own rudeness. People really believe that it is ok to just say things like this.
"Well, I'm sorry, but it's the truth. I'm just saying."
What a total cop-out. What a way to devalue and belittle someone while trying to make yourself look innocent. Remember mom's old saying "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all?" It's a good rule. Even if something is TRUE, if it does not help lift someone up, don't say it. You don't have the right to start a mean comment with "I'm sorry, but" or end a mean comment with "I'm just saying." If you're really all about the honesty, start your comment out with "I'm a mean person and I want to make you feel bad, so..." because at least that is more honest.
No, I'm not mad at anyone. My daughter and I were doing her Bible studies tonight and were reading Ephesians 4:29:
Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths,but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen. (NIV)
I want her to know that the behavior I see online and in person is absolutely not acceptable. I want her to learn it from a young age, so she's not the mean person who hurts others with her words. Words do have power. Don't use them to hurt.
3 comments:
My 'favorite' is "I'm not racist, but..." Here's a hint: If you have to start a sentence like that, there is a 99.9% chance that you ARE indeed racist! I'm just sayin'. :)
Really good points.
I have to admit that i use "i'm just saying" all the time, but not after something mean; i.e.-you can NOT have too much cheese on fries, i'm just saying
Does it count if the person ASKED for your opinion?! I sure as hell am not gonna hold back if someone ASKS for the truth. "Not to be mean", "I'm sorry but" "Just sayin" YOU ASKED FOR IT!!!!
Ha, just had to!!!
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