Thursday, November 29, 2012

BFF's are hard to make

One of my best friend's (since high school, we went to college together too) dad passed away overnight.  Thankfully for me, this friend knows I am rarely on Facebook and sent me a message.  She was too choked up to call but wanted me to know.  I immediately started crying and was grateful that I was alone in the office.

Her dad had remarried and lived in Georgia.  Eventually she and her mom moved up there as well, to a different city.  I remember when her parents were married.  I would go to their house to eat or hang out.  When Paul had a beard, he eerily looked like my dad looks like with a beard.  It was crazy.

We had several messages back and forth today (she'll call me tonight, she can't sleep, etc.) and then she told me how much she loved me, and misses me.  She told me that even though I have tons of sisters, I was her sister (she's an only child) and she missed me.

And I was crying again.  In her time of pain, she made me feel so loved.  It's so very hard making true  friends when you're older.  Usually you end up making friends at work (I work with 6 men), or at a gym (don't go), at church (sadly, don't have a church) or at kids' school events (never really happened for me.)  The only close friends that I made after high school and college were when I first moved back to Florida when Jacob was under two.  I made some fantastic gal pals who then moved to Alabama and Minnesota.  Go figure.

I have wonderful work friends who came to my wedding 10 years ago and with whom I still talk to every day.  Their locales?  Boston, DC and Seattle.  All over the place.

Locally?  Nobody. I live in a rural community where no one else I know lives.  My sisters who I love are in S. Florida (2.5 hours away) or Tampa (2.5 hours away).

Jacob's aunt is still a good friend and wonderfully keeps in touch with me, but she has her own close-knit group from when she was in school, and we usually see each other 3 or 4 times a year.

Neighbors?  I has some cool ones 6 years ago who moved 6 months after we moved here.  The rest hide in their homes and the ones I do talk to are really more of a "wave hello" kind-of thing.

An old co-worker and his wife moved back a few months ago from Miami.  I was ecstatic.  She and I used to hang out a lot, but I'm so very afraid to scare her off by latching on to her.  She has tons of family and friends.  We talk about hanging out, but because I live in a rural part of northern central Florida & she lives in southern central Florida, it's about an hour one way to each other's homes, so this has not happened yet.

It's easy to say "It's easy to make friends" when you've never left the hometown area you went to high school in.  As an adult, making real friends is so hard.  (Maybe that's why I adore the Yada Yada book series, not classic fantastic literature,  with these women who make these amazing bonds as adults; because I really want that too.)

I have amazing friends.  They're just so far away.

I love you Kelli-Kelli-Elliot (not her real name; college joke) and I am so sorry about your daddy.

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